Apr 27, 20226 min read

29 Years of Love

Updated: Apr 28, 2022

A man’s Definition of Love

Hi everybody,

it has been a few days since our last post. We all were enjoying our quality time with friends and family. Now back to the chaos and fight for survival. With all the bad news that we hear and experience, it can be very hard to move forward in life and that’s one good reason to be in a relationship with someone you trust and love and move together forward. One of the reasons for creation.

We all have to start by loving ourselves first. But what is Love?

I can only give you my definition of love as a MAN. Read part of my story and maybe you will be inspired. Enjoy the read and share if you like.

Disclaimer: I am no Therapist, Professor, etc. just a 60-year-old with lots of experience offering his tips! At the end of this blog, I have a few tips for you which can be useful for some.

When I was in grammar school (3rd grade), I received my first message of “puppy love” (Valentine’s card) affection from a girl classmate (1969 /70) and she was white. Up until that time and some years beyond, I was going through some crazy psychological abuses (private, and in school) so that sign of affection was explosive for me – someone besides my mom, a total stranger, a white girl (taboo back then) asked me to be her valentine and little boyfriend!

I hadn’t a clue what a boyfriend was and what he was required to do. I didn’t have a father at home or anywhere for that matter, to ask his wise opinion, so I had to rely on the television, there was no internet yet – thank goodness 😊. So, I would walk with Sarah carrying her books, get to the corner of her street, get a quick kiss of gratitude, and varoom, I had to jet back into safe territory.

Back then things on television were a lot cleaner, men and women dressed clean – they were dressed. Movies from stars like Sidney Poitier, Doris Day, Rachel Welch, Pam Grier, Billy D Williams, etc. inspired me, they gave me a vision of something I wanted, when I grew up, and that was to be in love. I think not ever having a father, played a major role also.

And then came the teen years of going to a girl’s house, putting on my best behavior, asking the parents for their permission to take their daughter on a date, etc. Well, along the way, while getting my naïve heart broken, because of my pure clean intentions of meeting that special someone (hopefully in a religious community), who I would marry and live happily ever after drastically changed. Girls in my community didn’t want me, simply because I was poor.

I grew up with religion and at the beginning of the ancient scriptures, where man was created with a woman the creator said: “be fruitful and multiply”. Well, thanks to the tips and other negative influences, I didn’t pay attention to the details of the fine print, only the be fruitful and multiply part. Modern TV, Movies, Music, and Men in society, gave me wrong impressions of how to be a man with women. A real man had a stall of ladies, like horses and you had to be macho to be happy. I didn’t have a bad conscience because religious people like David, Solomon, and Arabian sheiks, etc. all had many women.

For a while, I thought I was finally happy, almost a new book of girls changed by the season, then it started getting boring and something was missing, and that was the feeling I had from the little girl in the 3rd grade – true love. Well, after joining the army and going to a totally new country (Germany) and meeting different girls, I made an experience with a different type of woman and decided now I’m ready to settle down and have children. Got married and have two lovely children, but within 7 years (5 which were just ugly), it just didn’t work – I wasn’t ready – Why? I really didn’t understand women (heavy disagreements) and most importantly I didn’t even know myself yet.

Had a divorce and after some time back in the states in the casino world, I forgot all the pain again and said never ever marriage and commitment. Every woman I had, I was honest with and mentioned my being with others, this seemed to just bring on more, new adventures – normally a man’s dream, for me it was utter sadness, I stopped going out, I started getting back closer to the creator again and was pretty content. Then one night, SHE walked past me, speaking German in the Casino.

I love humor and making people smile so I said something in German and she and her girlfriend turned around, I just looked up in the air as if it wasn’t me, she came to me and said: “excuse me did you just speak German?”, I: “sorry sweety this is America we speak English here”. She, “Oh I’m sorry”. I, “Keine Ursache” (no problem). She cracked up. We talked all night at the bar I sent her back in a Limousine to NYC, no kissing, and no romancing and that was it. She is 11 years younger and at that time, I was 30 so I didn’t want to mess up a pure innocent angel like her.

Well to bring this part to a quick end, after she visited me the following year, within 6 days, I dropped the knee and we have been married and have children ever since – it felt like coming home, I finally found true love!

Did you know that there are over 900 thousand divorces in America every year?

There are many reasons why, but mostly because of finances, trust, etc. Since my 60 years of living on this planet, I have come to realize that great friendships & relationships lead to success in health, and wealth, and your children also will grow healthy and more satisfied in life.

If you want to make your relationship work or looking for true love, get to know yourself and who you truly are first. If you like yourself, great then you can advertise your you (the right way), but before making your advertisement, know something about women/men, how they think and feel (generally), think about what your potential love for life should BE like, beginning from the inside out. Not what they should look like on the outside. Sure, looks matter, but secondary.

That’s a problem in most relationships, people start from the outside, and it can be hazardous. Find someone who has likes and dislikes that you have. Don’t first jump in the bed and then start to think if it is the right one. I could go on and on here, but I will save it for another time. Just know that my definition of love is that, deep down feeling of comfort inside when you have someone, whom you know without a doubt you are sharing that feeling with.

A feeling of trust, yes, my wife and I were jealous at times, of outsiders checking the merchandise of the other, but it was healthy jealousy, and I have to say, my wife has always given me freedom and space – all people need it, but also in different ways. Yes, we men are blessed with testosterone, which sometimes overrides, and our optics get glued to the wrong places, but with practice, we get better 😊.

Love in a relationship is like the need to be with that someone, like the need for oxygen to live. That someone you want to protect and enjoy their feeling of protection, that someone you can argue with but knowing each of you will never accept going to bed in anger, even when you still disagree. A person that stands not behind or in front, but beside you in every way. That person whom you feel shares a soul with you and feels the surety that this love will continue in the afterlife. Wish you all to find your true love and that you spread the energy of love across the planet.

And now my small tip. If you plan to bend the knee to propose or you wish to renew your vows, it may be difficult to go down and come back up, due to knee joint difficulties. Or you are young and just had a lot of wear and tear on your joints through sport. There is a proven product that is also guaranteed to relieve pain and not only that, but restores bone health. The product is guaranteed and all-natural. Have a look at all of the ingredients and clinical studies.